Why are so many people in their 20s taking so long to grow up?

[LailaK]

Reality can be a b*tch. I find myself thinking about having babies more often nowadays. Babies and toddlers have always been drawn to me. The stare/giggle/walk up to me in public places. They're so beautiful and innocent. I absolutely love them. I've always thought they were cute but now I actually have a longing to have a little goober of my own.

The cutest little girl walked up to me at the airport in Amsterdam while I was on layover. I sat and talked with her and her mother for a few hours and all I could feel was envy for the woman. More than anything I would have loved to be traveling with my gorgeous little girl and doting husband.

In reality, I'm 25, I'm building my career and my savings, I'm paying off student loans by myself, and I have HORRIBLE taste in men as most on this forum have read. I'm working on all of these things but there's no way I could give a kid everything he or she deserves and needs at the moment. It's possible I won't be ready for another 5 years. Should I just give up my dream of having kids once I hit 30? I think not. I'm also strongly against getting prego out of wedlock. I've seen this happen to the majority of my female cousins and that is not the life for me.

Bottom line is that there's nothing wrong with waiting. A lot of people are waiting for very mature reasons. Doesn't mean they're not "grown up".

[asdfg789]

Just to add more food for thought :

my SO took things in this sequence : study, marriage, kids, career.

she actually was working low key and building her work credentials thru the study/marriage phases. took time off for the kids.
then went back to work with a fervour and doing pretty well now. many global companies (esp. American) prefer family women for middle level managers
because of their mental maturity and the ability to juggle tasks. of couse it helps that in Asia, we can get domestic help for a reasonable amount of money.

[Mish]

Hmmm, Its possible to have children young and them have disabilities. The way medicine has progressed, i really dont think it is that unsafe or risky to have them late 30's.

Sorry, I missed your post qwerty.

Okay, I'll use an analogy for this. There is always a risk of a person being hit by a car while crossing the road. Many people die crossing the road every year and it's an inescapable fact that this will continue to happen. But I come from the perspective that the risk of you getting hit by a car while crossing the road dramatically decreases if you look both ways to make sure no cars are there. It doesn't eliminate the risk completely, but reduces it substantially. Some people will say, it's still possible to get hit by a car even if you look both ways, so why bother, if you're bound to get hit then you will get hit, it's in the hands of God so look both ways or don't look both ways it's still going to happen? Let's just say that, that's not a point of view I subscribe to. I prefer to take all necessary precautions.