Basically we broke up for a few reasons. He had become distant, he ignored me but told me he still loved me. It was as if he was trying to get me to do something and I had no idea what it was. I tried so hard but I believed I was making him unhappy and that in turn was making me even more unhappy. I thought he had fallen out of love with me. What really got to me was the ignoring and reluctance to see me etc.
So i initiated the break up. He told me he did care and that he did love me. But he told me it hadnt been working for a few months and when I asked him if we should split up he said maybe, so we agreed to split.
I thought I would be okay but I have become steadily more depressed every day. I miss him so much and I am so lonely. The problem is he doesn't even want to know anymore. Things went steadily downhill and I could see it. I desperately tried to stop it but I couldn't. At first I played the obsessive ex card which I know now I shouldn't have done. I begged him to take me back, I told him how much I loved him, sending up to 20 texts a day. Then he basically told me to leave him alone. So I did.
We didn't talk for more than a week. In that time he made posts about hot celebrities, something he had never done before and implicitly hinted that he would tell people an embarrassing secret of mine, not to me, but on twitter. Turns out he had just said it and hadn't told anyone anything. I couldn't understand it. I have tried to be as mature as I can about it.
I spoke to him a few days after about giving each other our stuff back. I asked him if he didnt love me. He simply said you turned me away. I don't really know what that means... and then we said goodnight and that was it. A few days later he liked a page on facebook "the awkward eye contact with your ex goat" which really annoyed me because I feel I have tried so hard to make him happy and be nice about this whole thing. I texted him today saying that we needed to talk but i got no reply. I never expect any reply because all he does is ignore me. Sometimes he will talk, sometimes he wont. I asked him if he wanted to be friends and he said no, something which saddened me because we had been friends for about 2 years. I hate how miserable I feel, yet I asked him if he was happy that we'd split up and he said yes and asked me if i felt the same to which i replied honestly.
He told me he hates me (I hurt him badly) and doesn't care. But why would he make such an effort to make digs at me? Why can't he just be mature and talk to me properly about our relationship? Why does he have to ignore me?
I feel I can't move on until we talk face to face about everything, becuse lack of communication was also responsible for our break up. I love him with everything in me and I wanted our relationship to change. It was becoming unhealthy. I love him so much and it kills me when he ignores me. What should I do? Please be brutally honest I hate the fact I have this deluded hope in me that maybe, just maybe we will get back together. But I know from experience that every time you get your hopes up you just end up disappointed. I try and tell myself he is never coming back but I wish he would, I can't help it.