Guidance anyone?

[flyesp]

So i messed up with my girlfriend. And this is how it went and i would just like some others opinions on what i and she should do.

I have been dating this girl for about a year and a half and things have been overall really well. Our relationship was very easygoing in a sense that we didnt do much to control the other. She had her guy friends and i had my friends that were girls. Of course like in alot of relationships there were a few bumps in the road but we got over them (she cheated on me in our first three months). Anyway recently i met a girl about six months ago who is just a friend and i have no feelings for but my girlfriend sees otherwise. She started demanding and asking me to promise her that i would never see this girl again. I agreed to keep things cool which was probably my first mistake. Anyway as time goes i still harmlessly talk to this girl but now its behind my girlfriends back. I even see her a few times and then she calls me and asks me to see her new place. She moved so i was like what the heck why not. I check out her place and what not then leave. Well my girlfriend found out about all of this and not from me. I feel horrible because i had no intentions of cheating i just didnt want to argue over something i felt was harmless. My girlfriend or ex i guess you could say is heartbroken and i have no idea what i can do to earn her back. I love this girl to death its just amazing how something innocent can turn into so much. Should she take me back? i understand what i did was wrong. It is just really hard to stop talking to a friend because of my girlfriends insecurities.

Thanks,
Flyesp

[Raze]

I don't understand why you would go in this girl's house. Do you know that means sex? Welcome to Dating 101. That's your first lesson of the day. You deserve to be left for being stupid like that. Don't let it happen again.

You could at least hang with her with your gf. Sheeessshhh.. Stuppppaaaaddddd.

You could have at least understood your gfs feelings. I think you need to moveon. Just don't let it happen again, okay? No, I don't think you can save it. OF course she's going to assume that you're cheating if you're in this girl's house. You could have at least told this girl "I don't think that's a good idea, thanks for the offer."

[flyesp]

The night i went to that girls house i couldnt get ahold of my girlfriend because she was out with her friend her friends bf and his buddy?? double datish if you ask me I feel like this had a big influence on me. My girlfriend doesnt believe i cheated but the fact that i lied is tearing her apart.

[MikaMoo]

for one sorry to be immature but i think what raze said is kind of stupid...
anyways, your girlfriend obviously has insecurities with you and this other girl.
Have you ever bothered asking your girlfriend why she is making a demand and making you promise that you cant talk to this other again?
You should try and talk with her about why she is obviously jealous of this other girl.
& whatever she says just try and make her feel better if she starts to cry, if she really means this much to you, say something that will make her realize what a mistake she made of breaking up with you and assuming the worst from you.
Just tell her the absolute truth about the other girl, and if you have to tell her that this other girl has a boyfriend, even if it's not true. might help.
who told your girlfriend about you being over there at the girl's house anyways?
one of your buddies i suppose?

[MikaMoo]

I don't understand why you would go in this girl's house. Do you know that means sex? Welcome to Dating 101. That's your first lesson of the day. You deserve to be left for being stupid like that. Don't let it happen again.

You could at least hang with her with your gf. Sheeessshhh.. Stuppppaaaaddddd.

You could have at least understood your gfs feelings. I think you need to moveon. Just don't let it happen again, okay? No, I don't think you can save it. OF course she's going to assume that you're cheating if you're in this girl's house. You could have at least told this girl "I don't think that's a good idea, thanks for the offer."

I agree with you when you talked about him going to the girl's house, but that might not necessarily be the case, his gf might not have even thought about that in the first place.
but it's obvious that he couldn't hang out with his gf and the girl, cuz she is obviously jealous of her whether they hang out together or not.
i think he does understand his girlfriend's feelings but i think she mistook a harmless friendship into a "mistress". which she shouldn't have with her having experience of cheating on him previously.
if he really wants her and loves her he might be able to save the relationship.
If she's just a friend literally it would be fine going over to her house as long as neither of them have feelings for each other, and possibly having other people there as well. but we don't know we werent there.

[flyesp]

Hey thanks, to help you get a better understanding on the deal mika ill answer a few of the questions you have posted. No it wasnt one of my buddies who told her, it was her friend who found out because her friend works with that girls house who i visited's roommate. They were talking at work and thats how that came about. Yes i have talked to her about these demands and she said it was because the other girl couldnt be trusted?? I never really got that because i thought i was the one she needed to trust. And for who was at this girls house when i stopped by it was her and her roommate we all sat on the couch and chatted. It just blows my mind that I cant have friends of the other sex but she can and it be okay.

[NeoSeminole]

flyesp says:

"Yes i have talked to her about these demands and she said it was because the other girl couldnt be trusted?? I never really got that because i thought i was the one she needed to trust."

when a girl uses that line, she really means that she doesn't trust you but wants to look like an understanding girlfriend. So she puts the blame on other girls. Don't let her fool you.

"It just blows my mind that I cant have friends of the other sex but she can and it be okay."

f*ck your ex gf. Trust me, you're better off without her.