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Thread: platonic confusion

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    platonic confusion

    Sorry i didn't know where also to post this, but...

    I have this friend whom I REALLY like, known each other for 2 years. It's platonic, but there's chemistry even though we're both taken.
    But anyway, this isn't about what I should do about the situation, but rather about his behaviour.
    We're great in person; laugh, talk, flirt, tickle, playfight etc etc I have always gotten the impression that we were genuine.
    I get the impression that he's not a huge web-presence person. No MySpace, facebook, blogs profiles etc anywhere. He has msn but only for the sake of chatting to certain people when he needs to.

    I've talked to him a couple of times on msn but it was always shortlived.
    However, just 20 mins ago I saw him sign on and then go offline about 2 mins later. I have a means of seeing who's online and who's not - and he was, apparently. So he's either blocked me or is 'appearing offline'. Things ran through my head: he's trying to tone down our interactions, his gf was there, he was appearing offline to everyone, or he doesn't actually like me (but wtf, why not??)

    I absolutely do not understand why he would block me when we're so genuinely friendly in person. Am I looking too much into this because I AM a net freak? Maybe not everyone sees internet interaction the way I do. But it's really confusing and I'm feeling rather deflated. I keep thinking that real life is a better indicator of where we stand, but... gahh

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    maybe the fact that he does have a gf is the problem. either that or he's just invisible to everyone.

    raverboy
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    What's the big deal?

    I sign onto AIM just to see who's on and sign right back off again.

    You're creating drama.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Frasbee View Post
    What's the big deal?

    I sign onto AIM just to see who's on and sign right back off again.

    You're creating drama.
    yeah I know I'm creating a drama and I'm mentally shaking my head at myself. There probably is no big deal - but he is apparently online and I just can't think of a reasonable explanation for him appearing to be offline * to me after being on for 2 mins.

    sorry, I overreact sometimes and I guess I need others to tell me this so I realise it!


    * edit: i.e. seeming to be OFFLINE while he is apparently ONLINE.

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    yes you are overreacting, NOW can we move onto the next matter??

    raverboy
    ...this is just my perspective on the situation...

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    hehe
    and what's the next matter?

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    we've got to get back t the part and drink more liquor.

    raverboy
    ...this is just my perspective on the situation...

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    Quote Originally Posted by miSSleepy View Post
    Sorry i didn't know where also to post this, but...

    I have this friend whom I REALLY like, known each other for 2 years. It's platonic, but there's chemistry even though we're both taken.
    But anyway, this isn't about what I should do about the situation, but rather about his behaviour.
    We're great in person; laugh, talk, flirt, tickle, playfight etc etc I have always gotten the impression that we were genuine.
    I get the impression that he's not a huge web-presence person. No MySpace, facebook, blogs profiles etc anywhere. He has msn but only for the sake of chatting to certain people when he needs to.

    I've talked to him a couple of times on msn but it was always shortlived.
    However, just 20 mins ago I saw him sign on and then go offline about 2 mins later. I have a means of seeing who's online and who's not - and he was, apparently. So he's either blocked me or is 'appearing offline'. Things ran through my head: he's trying to tone down our interactions, his gf was there, he was appearing offline to everyone, or he doesn't actually like me (but wtf, why not??)

    I absolutely do not understand why he would block me when we're so genuinely friendly in person. Am I looking too much into this because I AM a net freak? Maybe not everyone sees internet interaction the way I do. But it's really confusing and I'm feeling rather deflated. I keep thinking that real life is a better indicator of where we stand, but... gahh

    If your relationship is platonic and you are both in relationships , I'm not sure why you are so bothered about him logging off or appearing offline or whatever .....

    I would only start being bothered about that kind of thing if my feelings were more than platonic .

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    I had an online relationship with a girl from California for a year (I'm from London). I went out there and lived with her for three months around Christmas time and we had the best and worst of times.

    We used msn messenger and cammed all day every day when we could.

    Now that we've split up, i hate using IM programs and am never online on msn.
    [URL="http://matchpoints.co.uk/"]Free Dating[/URL]

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    Quote Originally Posted by lin View Post
    If your relationship is platonic and you are both in relationships , I'm not sure why you are so bothered about him logging off or appearing offline or whatever .....

    I would only start being bothered about that kind of thing if my feelings were more than platonic .

    because he's a friend, and I'd feel the same if my best girl friend did the same.

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    It sounds to me like he is trying to avoid trouble.

    I've gotta ask - if you both like each other so much, why are you paired up with other people? Do you have kids, or something?
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Maybe he appeared offline because he was involved in a conversation that he didn't want to interrupt. Some people are only good at doing one thing at a time. I'm pretty sure it wasn't actually about you.
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    It's not platonic.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Frasbee View Post
    It's not platonic.
    I agree. You should look at this more closely.
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