weird feelings

[sonofgod]

happy new year everbody

well this is whats going on with me lately. ive been dating for more than 1 year with my gf. we get along well, not great. i told before here that sometimes can get obssessed and rather tries to control me the same time she is always concerned of how much money she has and how much mercedes her dad drives. well weve argued a couple weeks ago but she apologized and everythings fine. i thougt! well i came back to school from christmas holidays and the same reaction happens every time i look at this gorgeous girl that is sit right next to my table . me and the girl are friends, get on well and talk many times. she doesnt know that im completely obsessed with her, every time i look at her i feel like grabbing her and do whatever i want to. i would like to ask her out on a date, or to become closer to her everytime i see her drunk at the club () but i just cant cause i have a girlfriend! and im afraid to lose her. but things can get even worse because i dont know if this girl feels anything for me (probably she doesnt). i just dont wanna end up alone because of this kiddish thoughts of mine. help me out girls i know u understand me

[sir_vile_minds]

Maybe switch places with someone so you're not constantly beside this girl?

I can't remember the exact words but the quote goes: "Never leave the one you love you for the one you like because can't remember the rest" but basically it says if you do the above then the one you like will just kick you to the curb.

[sonofgod]

well. read the "i feel like a jerk" post in the "ask a man forum". the guy feels just like i do. i lost the interest in her and in the relationship. and then i look at this new girl and start thinking how i would be happy if i was just flirting around with her. well i so much confused to explain whats going on. i just cant stand keeping it to myself. hope you understand me, im not that strong of a man anyway..

oh and i am afraid i end up alone like i did for years before this relationship

[sir_vile_minds]

It sounds like you're already flirting with her. The best the way to go about it is write up the pros and cons of dumping your current girlfriend for someone who may not want to be with you. And ask yourself a few questions like "Is she the one for me really or will it just be a fling?" and how much do you really love your girlfriend and is she worth being with?

Also beware of using this new girl as a rebound partner. You dump your gf for her and you'll probably still be in love with her and in turn arguments will start up between this new girl because she isn't like your current gf and such like.

I don't know exactly how you feel about your gf but do you really want to risk being alone? Are you sure it's a risk worth taking?

[sonofgod]

i really dont know. if you pick a balance with 2 dishes and in one dish you put what my gf has which makes me happy and in the other dish you put what my gf has, says or do which makes me sad i think that the 2nd hypothesis is way more heavy... im not that much of a risk taker or if i am i take them with no conscience. i usually dont think before acting and sometimes i get lucky. sometimes i dont. im way too young to get stuck to a person whose appeal is fading away. i personally dont know what to do because im very insecure. mainly, i dont know where to find any safe situation. thats how i am right now... being alone wouldnt be that bad would it?

[Lite]

Here's a tip. If you're not comfortable being alone with yourself, nobody will want to be in a relationship with you. Hanging onto a relationship that you clearly don't want out of fear of being alone means you have other issues to address, and probably shouldn't be dating anyone at all. Better figure out why you're so afraid of being alone first, then go date someone second.