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Thread: Helpppp, please ladies!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
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    1

    Helpppp, please ladies!

    I'm a guy and I've been best friends with this girl Lauren for the past several years. I go to college out east while she goes to college out West. I'm a Sophomore and she's a freshman. Unfortunately, I've recently found myself falling for her. She's always been there for me and really knows me better than anyone, including my family oddly enough! Last summer when I got back from college, we hung out everyday. That's not an exaggeration. I can't count how many times we hung out. It was great and I'm so happy when I'm with her. Unfortunately, like I said earlier, I fell for her. I hid this for about a month and then I just told her straight up. She didn't feel the same way and loved our friendship. We haven't talked about since, but my feelings grow stronger for her.

    HOWEVER, there's another girl named Kayla that I've had an on and off "thing" with for the past year. Lauren hates it! It's because I've done some wrong and treated her unfairly opposed to Kayla in the past. So, it's quite understandable.

    Some of my friends have told me that Lauren is just straight jealous and likes me. But the weird thing is, I don't know if she does. She has openly stated that she gets jealous of other girls, doesn't like me going out, and hates to "share" me. Are these indications that she does like me? Because there's another guy that's been involved with her that makes me think otherwise.

    And as for me, I've been again talking to Kayla lately which has really upset Lauren. I like Kayla and I'm continuing to talk to her because I feel like there's no chance with Lauren. This has caused Lauren to get mad at me. However, it's hard for me to take it anywhere with girls because I always compare them to Lauren and it's really starting to bother me. I mean, we have one of those friendships that's like "We're best friends, lets get married at 30, blah, blah, blah..."

    I don't know what I should do. I can't get over Lauren and there is no way I can tell her how I feel. On the other side, I'm talking to Kayla again because I feel there's no chance with Lauren... but that's only ruining my friendship with her.

    Any advice girls? What is on this girl's mind? Why does she get jealous, not want to share me, etc, etc, etc., but still not like me? I don't get it. I think talking to her is almost out of the question.

    What should I do about Kayla?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    385
    She's this way because she's controlling and petty. It'd be best to leave it at that and not attempt to figure her out any further. You're better off without Lauren.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
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    Female
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    Scandinavia
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    Well, I think you should talk with Lauren. Seems like you are very serious about her and if you will not find out how she feels about you, this question will always be in your head. And you will always compare other girls with her. Things you describe about her: seems like she likes you, but does not want to admin it. It is better to find out for sure instead of wonder all the time. Do not you think so?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Gender
    Female
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    here, there, everywhere.
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    25
    IDK, but maybe she has the 'jealous best friend syndrome' going on?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    16,935
    You should date Kayla. The reason you think you can't get over Lauren is that you haven't tried. Right now, she's your supply for care and understanding. Too bad she can't be your supply for affection as well, but she turned you down, didn't she? Give someone else a shot at making you happy.

    Understand this, Trilla: your friendship was over when you fell for her. It changed everything and it's NEVER going to be the same.

    I suggest you get some guy friends, start dating Kayla, and tell Lauren to take her show on down the road. If you let this situation go on as it is, Lauren will cock-block you at every turn and you'll end up at her wedding as a virgin bridesmaid rather than the groom.
    Spammer Spanker

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    50
    You need to sit down and talk to Lauren. Ask her how she truley feels and let her know how you feel about her. Communication is key.

    If she does not feel the same about you then she should not be getting jealous and should be letting you get on with your life. Thats what friends do, they are there for you and support you.

    If she says that she is not interested in more than friends. Let her know that you understand and that you are grateful for her honesty. Also let her know that she needs to allow you to get on with your life.

    Also if you have strong feelings for Lauren you should not get with the other girl as it is not fair. You can not have a relationship with someone else until you are completly over the other person.

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