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Thread: i think im in the friend zone, but not sure help me out.

  1. #1
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    i think im in the friend zone, but not sure help me out.

    In september i asked a girl out that i used to know from class. She said no, because i was 22, she was 24 (yes, thats what she said, i find this bogus). I defriended her on facebook, responded to only one of the 10 or so texts shes sent me since then, etc.

    A few days ago i ran into her (i seriously didnt plan this) at a club meeting, and said hey, and just walked away. Later that night i sent her a message over facebook saying "Even though i think youre immature and need high school drama in your relationships, i hope all is well. Peace and love sweety."

    She responded

    "It was so great to see u . It was the highlight of my day, but we didnt really get the chance to talk. Stay sweet and awesome."

    Im pretty sure that was from the heart, and that she only looks at me as a friend. Thoughts? Im not planning on refriending her yet, if at all. Im thinking about just waiting for her to initiate conversation next time.

    My problem with this girl is exactly that, shes a girl. I thought she was a woman. Not interested in drama games. I mean i can play the mature "love games" perfectly fine. I didnt want to play these high school "love games". I think i need to find a time to call her out on this, but if im in the friend zone already that doesnt look attractive, it looks douche.

    Thats why the friend zone is so damn hard to get out of, you cant play "good natured outspoken critic" to her without coming across as an ass.

  2. #2
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    Dec 2009
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    I'm no expert, but I don't think you're in the friend zone.

    Typically people that end up in the friend zone are guys who:

    - Spend a lot of time with a girl and never make a move
    - Guys that don't create any sexual tension with a girl
    - End up being the guy she calls to complain about her day, complain about her life, her current boyfriend, and basically has made another girlfriend out of
    - They will talk to you a lot generally speaking

    In my opinion, I think you played it well and she's actually interested in pursuing you. You blew her off and she probably didn't expect that - this makes you a little different and more of a challenge. I think you could play ball with this one if you wanted to.

  3. #3
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    "- End up being the guy she calls to complain about her day, complain about her life, her current boyfriend, and basically has made another girlfriend out of"

    she's done that once already, im a tad worried to be quite honest. Its why i didnt respond to her texts. My topic on the ask a female board is a similar situation. Both girls (were talkin like during a 2 week spread on each other), declined my date offer due to my age. Its frustrating. I dont have a thing for older women. I had a thing for THESE women. This girl i just stopped talking to.

  4. #4
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    Don't make it a thing about her, let her know you're readily available to others as well. It may be cliche, especially on LP. But it's used many times for a reason. "Trigger her jealousy" The ladies love having things they can't have, if that makes any sense at all.
    Stay away from being the shoulder to lean on. By no means, don't be a jerk and be cold.
    Then the rest is up to you. Go in for the kill :]

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
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    ya a girl does that to me and i know how u feel it sucks especially when u do make a move and they turn u down (3 times ) sayin tehy only like u as a friend i know it sucks friend zone is not a fun place

  6. #6
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    Let's see, you're calling her names, trying to define her as the immature one when your own responses and how you react to her are immature. And, she didn't rise to your baited hook either.

    I'd say she's the more mature person, and you're not worth her time. Maybe it's not your physical age she's turned off by, but your emotional age. Unfriending people on facebook over a temper tantrum. Oh no, how horrible can you get!
    "Well, then," the Cat went on, "you see a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad."

  7. #7
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    Oh dear, if some guy emailed me saying "Even though i think youre immature and need high school drama in your relationships" I would be highly offended and tell him where to shove it!~

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