Okay, seriously? Ex-gf tells me she's dating someone, and then calls acting friendly.

[durkadurka]

I will make this as brief as I can.

3 months ago, I broke up with my ex of nearly 2.5 years.

We lived together, had fun together, but life, and family problems pushed us apart. I am still in school in the city I live in, her parents are a financial catastrophe on the other side of the continent, and I couldn't reconcile the burden her family was going to be while I was in school. She moved back there to help them only partly to help them, but also because our relationship wasn't moving forward.

From my perspective, until this issue with her parents became more clear I wasn't prepared to let it advance. There are a few other problems, but this is the main one. As time went on, we grew apart because we started to focus on the problems and not the GREAT times we had.

We were planning on getting married.


Okay now that the preamble is over with

3 months ago she moved out of our apartment and moved home. She hadn't lived at home for nearly 7 years, and was pretty lonely. Her family situation is very intense due to the situation down there, and their family antics has proven to be challenging for her.

For the first two months she was down there, she was calling me 2-3 times a day, venting, crying, and my family and I was there to support her. Eventually I ended up flying down there to visit, we had a blast together, it was probably the best time I've had in years, but potentially also the worst decision I've made in years.

About a week after I got home, and telling me how much she missed me and wished I'd stayed longer, she stops calling (around August 10th).

I get one call August 18th, and then she goes MIA for 2 weeks. Being concerned, I sent her an email asking her if she's okay. She never gets back to me, so I call her. Goes to Voice Mail.

(August 30th) Eventually I get a phone call saying that she's okay, that she's busy, doing well, but the call sounds really odd, she's hiding something. She's dating someone. Great - Whoopdeedoo, she met the guy a week after I left. Long story short, everything I've heard about the guy leads me to believe he's a complete loser. But that's not important.

Low class? I think so.


Aside from a brief email asking her what she wanted me to do with the stuff she left behind in the apartment, I completely fell off the face of the Earth when it came to communicating with her.

No texting, no emailing, no calling. Nada, nothing. She used me. The Monkey Theory was in full effect here.

After nearly 3 weeks of not talking, I get a phone call money from her. I don't want to talk to her. It goes to voice mail where she leaves a VERY nervous message, asking me how I'm doing, that she hopes my work week started off well, and that I can call her back if I would like to.

I don't.

3 days pass, I get a text message saying 'Not going to return my call?'

Ignore it.

She calls me today, I finally pick up because I'm starting to get irritated. After what she did there should be no question as to WHY I am really bothered by this.

The conversation is pretty one dimensional, she asks me how I am doing, what my living situation is like (she knows I'm moving out of our old apartment), how school is going, and how my family is. I respond pretty mundanely, and ask her what her work situation is like down there.

I get a pretty vanilla response that it's a roller coaster, that she's not sure if things are going to work out down there, but she wants to have an apartment for October if things are going to work. If things aren't going to work out, she's going to go to South America indefinitely with a friend.

I take this opportunity to point out to her that some of what she said when she called me last was hurtful and pissed me off and that I don't really know what to tell her.

Her response: I don't remember our last conversation.







Honestly, what does this chick want from me? I finally moved on past this thing and she calls and starts badgering me when I don't call her back? If she wants me to ease her conscience she's looking at the wrong guy.

I think after this much time I've forgotten that I'm actually a bit of a stud. I'm back into playing 3 sports, 5 classes at school, working 25 hours a week still, and I'm good looking (lost 10 pounds since I found all of this dirt up).

Don't get me wrong, I still care for her, but purely in a romantic sense, I have enough friends I don't need another.

[Boisdevie]

Sounds like she hasn't moved on and still wants you. I've been experiencing the same kind of thing recently with an ex - one minute she says I"m a complete bastard then a day later suggests getting together for the weekend.

[doppelgaenger]

If a girl was mind****ing me like that, I would confront her straight up - "What in the hell do you want, woman? We broke up months ago, we're over. How come you expect me to pick up or return your phone calls, as if I am still your boyfriend? You need to cut that shit out - you're dating other people, we're not together anymore. It's not my responsibility to ensure that you have an apartment at any time. I already agreed to do that with you once and you ****ed me over by moving out. You're better off packing up all your shit and moving to South America, and never calling me again, because you have the short term memory of a goldfish. **** you and have a nice day."

[durkadurka]

Sounds like she hasn't moved on and still wants you. I've been experiencing the same kind of thing recently with an ex - one minute she says I"m a complete bastard then a day later suggests getting together for the weekend.

I don't know if that's the case, as she's seeing someone else.

I think I'm upset about this because in my own dismal way I gave it my all, and I went out in the worst way possible. Finding out she's dating someone after 3 days.

It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't worked so hard at the end.

[durkadurka]

If a girl was mind****ing me like that, I would confront her straight up - "What in the hell do you want, woman? We broke up months ago, we're over. How come you expect me to pick up or return your phone calls, as if I am still your boyfriend? You need to cut that shit out - you're dating other people, we're not together anymore. It's not my responsibility to ensure that you have an apartment at any time. I already agreed to do that with you once and you ****ed me over by moving out. You're better off packing up all your shit and moving to South America, and never calling me again, because you have the short term memory of a goldfish. **** you and have a nice day."

Short term memory of a gold fish, that's hilarious. I will have to remember that.

It pisses me off that she's calling to 'check in with me'... Excuse me? You don't NEED to check in with me anymore, the time for that ended a while ago, when you decided to stop calling and start dating someone else.

[MerryH]

Short term memory of a gold fish, that's hilarious. I will have to remember that.

It pisses me off that she's calling to 'check in with me'... Excuse me? You don't NEED to check in with me anymore, the time for that ended a while ago, when you decided to stop calling and start dating someone else.

Yeah, man, calling you to see how you're doing, what a total b*tch! I mean you broke up with her and now she's dating someone else, that whore. How dare she!


....

That's sarcasm, by the way.

[durkadurka]

Yeah, man, calling you to see how you're doing, what a total b*tch! I mean you broke up with her and now she's dating someone else, that whore. How dare she!


....

That's sarcasm, by the way.

I never called her a whore, and never called her a bitch. I just think it's bizarre.

[MerryH]

I never called her a whore, and never called her a bitch. I just think it's bizarre.

I know, I just think your reactions toward her are unreasonable. Getting mad at her for all this is bizarre.

[durkadurka]

I know, I just think your reactions toward her are unreasonable. Getting mad at her for all this is bizarre.

I'm upset because she's the one that's told me that our relationship served its purpose and that it's time to move on.

Now that I've started to make that new life for myself, it's very confusing and hard on me to have her call me, and get upset when I don't return her call.

It's like she wants the best of both worlds, to have all the fun she wants down there, while keeping the benefits of my friendship.

[breacliff]

hmmp i dont have any idea why she goes to other man. thanks for sharing.
Did you know you can say ordinary things like "Please pass the salt" and just by changing your voice make it sexy, make it dirty - even though the words are clean?