Crushing this crush...

[MichaelBub]

Hey there,

I am in need of some big help.

Back story:

Fell in serious love with my bf and couldnt be away from him. He lived miles and miles awy and eventually after 5 months of plane fares etc we decided to move in together. Things were great, only we never really saw our friends but it didnt seem to matter as we had each other and even a cat!

However, I have a big history with men that my other half isnt entirely secure with. He is an angel, a solid rock that has had many long term relationships before while I, on the other hand experimented a lot. He is a little insecure about me meeting someone 'more exciting' than him.

Problem:

He was unsure of his best friends constant contact with me. His bestfriend still remains in another country and rarely speaks with him but we had a good chat thing going frequently, mostly career based as we share a similar career. We share a few things, in particular a very sexual profile.

I have no had any sexual feelings or even flirty likings for anyone since meeting my boyfriend but I keep fantasizing sexually about his bestfriend. I eventually came clean about it and all of a sudden my boyfriend is saying that he was being silly and his friend wasnt being flirty.

My best friend things it wasn't one way and either way, I'm not sure what to do. Should we still be living together? Or is it a phase? I love my boyfriend, I live with him...but there is pressure on us to work as we live together and I just wish his bestfriend had never came in to our lives as I am now worried I am going to ruin this relationship with the guilt of these feelings!

Any advice would be great, Im very confused. My head actually hurts.


p.s I should also say my other long term relationship ended due to me being obsessed with someone else. I think I might be worried of repeating history.

p.p.s these two friends have a history going back to school years of stealing each others girls. His bestfriend isn't flirty as such, just more in constant contact with 'teasing' that seems to me like flirting...?

[smackie9]

Well it's obvious the friend wants to do ya, that's a given. Girl you will always run into someone that "thrills you" as they say the grass always seems greener on the other side....it's just an infauation....it will fade if you let it. Stop talking to this dude.

[xxazurexx]

Is the initial poster a girl? Confusing and when they use a mans name as their username.

[MichaelBub]

I'm a Michael Buble fan sorry!

yes, I'm a girl!

Thank you so much for the previous post. Its great to hear someone reassure me like that.

[justcheckin]

oh a side note you should really drop the casual conversations with your boyfriends "sexy best friend", especially if they have have a bad history (with stealing girls) Im sure it bothers him pretty good.

[IncognitoSir]

Yeah, you seem to be fueling the fire a bit. Why are you still in contact with this guy? At this rate, you're leaving the door open for trust issues in your relationship. It comes down to what you want. Do you wanna stick with ol reliable, loving, long term boyfriend , or sexy, new, unknown potential girlfriend stealer guy?