Finding odd ways to actually move on.

[Toddstar]

As I was reading the post yesterday, and a lot of them are truly heartbreaking, I saw that someone had written the following: You cant get to the light at the end of the tunnel unless you start to move there. I was floored by that because I think that is excatly what a lot of us are doing; staring at the distant light waiting for it to come to us and cowering in the darkness. I was one of those people too. Up until yesterday. I realize now if I was with my ex I wouldnt be who I am now, stronger, more independent, happier (I know I am) and walking towards the light.

So I got up off my butt and joined a singles site. Now, I dont actually think I want to date yet but I would like to meet new people. I met someone last night, my first night on, who is my exes age within 12 days, same name, same age of kids, same first inital of last name. Its very weird but just chatting with her on bbm is allowing me to accept and understand that my ex HAS moved on and moving on actually feels good. I dont know if anything will come of this and maybe it will, but I finally have figured out who I am and what I want and I dont want my ex back. I KNOW in my heart I would gain weight, I would drink too much, I would have resentment, I would cringe a lot...I dont want any of that but it was finally time to admit to myself that she is not good for me and I AM better off with someone new.

There is a LOT of good advice on these forums; do as I did, really, take it, copy and paste to email and read it back to yourself daily. You will see the light and you will pick yourself up and walk towards it. Its worth it. TRUST me please!!

TS

[DarkHelmet82]

you need to love yourself first and foremost.. I didnt realize this until I read those books, but as they say "if you cant love yourself how can you love someone else." It is true. NOBODY can make a person happy except themselves. Good luck dude

[sookie6]

It's true dating new people helps a lot..but without setting high expectations just as a way to remind yourself that there are other people out there who moght be as interesting and inspiring as your ex was...even more...