Help me understand :(

[jonahwhufc]

Need help!

I was the nicest guy you could meet and now i'm the most insecure wreck and horrible person...

Basicially since march I cheated on my gf alot and I thought I didn't love her...we was together a year and 3 months and most of it was great..but just before i slept with someone else My girlfriend and I didnt have sex alot and it made me feel that she didnt love me...well before I changed and was having sex with anyone my gf kept saying she didnt know whether she wanted to be with me, but deep down I knew she was stressed from work college etc...but i'm not saying I had an excuse to cheat but I used that I think, then after cheating I suddenly started questioning myself if I loved my gf and I started not to fancy her which upset me because I kept trying because I did love her once

in between march and august (now) I kept saying i loved her then split and repeat etc. split with her like 4 times...when we split up the last time she found out i cheated on her by other people...i'm a bastard I know trust me!! well a month on (now) I was out and she was out and she was close to a male friend of mine and they kissed, seeing this made me realsise that over the next couple of days I do love her!!! anyway i thought maybe i could get her back...well its harder than i thought and i dont blame her tbh, I just want it all back how it was, how??? she says she's in love with me but finds it hard to trust and i need her reassurance and help to make her...how do i do this??

and why is she finding it so hard to get back with me isit because i cheated or split with her 4 times and she doesnt wanna get hurt??, plus she doesnt want people to know we are seeing eachother again because she thinks it will cause to much hassle with her friends mum etc... isit because she doesnt want people to think shes a fool for getting back with me??

so basicially...how do i get her to love, trust me again fully...i dont want to fail...one minute shes ok and the next shes angry upset with me!! I'm telling her i want her back and trust me alot and i say i love you alot...what else do i need to do...i cant help worry if she doesnt text me or she doesnt text back arghhhh!! i'm so insecure, keep thinking it wont work out for me!! im always asking her whats wrong if she looks funny or goes quiet...i want to stop this but i cant help myself say shit arghhhh help!!!

what do i do how...help !!! i know really its all my fault!! is he embarrased of me around other people?? ohh i dont know!!!!

[jonahwhufc]

bumpppppppppppp

[HeartIsAching]

Ain't gonna happen. Time for you to move on.

And get some counseling for your insecurity.

[Cerby]

You cheated on her you idiot! She doesn't want you back because you can't be trusted, you split with her, you don't know how to read your own emotions, you just a complete asshole who doesn't deserve anyone to love! Why should she take you back? So 3 months down the road you can get all insecure and cheat on her multiple times again? You need to figure yourself out, no one deserves the ride you're going to take them on.

You want to know what you can do for her thats best? Leave her alone, you've done enough.

[Andariel]

You cheated on her you idiot! She doesn't want you back because you can't be trusted, you split with her, you don't know how to read your own emotions, you just a complete asshole who doesn't deserve anyone to love! Why should she take you back? So 3 months down the road you can get all insecure and cheat on her multiple times again? You need to figure yourself out, no one deserves the ride you're going to take them on.

You want to know what you can do for her thats best? Leave her alone, you've done enough.

Spot on!!!