Involved with a Woman in a bad marriage

[anonymous001]

Hi,

About 1 year ago I reconnected with a woman I haven't seen in 7 years. When I first met her we were seeing each other for a few months. This time around, my intentions were to be just friends. She had told me she now has a baby and is in a marriage that isn't working out very well. We started communicating regularly and seeing each other for the first few months. She then separated with her husband and moved out of the house and out of the same city. Technically she is still married. We eventually became more than friends and had an intimate relationship (the first few months). Her husband found out about our relationship, but regardless still wants to be with her. He moved closer to where she lives (also for their son). Long story short, we are no longer intimate but still communicate and see each other (although we don't see each other as much). I've told her that my feelings for her are strong and I care about her, but the situation we're in is not good. She tells me that she also cares about me, but it's difficult for her to completely end her relationship with her husband because of their son and also because she feels guilty. At this point we both know that we have feelings for each other and talk about how we can only be friends for now. I know she cares for me but at the same time she struggles to make a decision and does not know what she wants. I can stay in touch with her, but I honestly can say that I don't see her just as a friend and it bothers me when she stays with her husband just for the weekends and comes back. Has anybody been through this situation before? (I don't know if I would call it a love triangle, but it is complicated) Any advice on what I should do and how I should look at this situation would be helpful. Thanks!

[IndiReloaded]

She's still married. Until that is no longer the case, you are enabling a woman to cheat. Stop it. Even if you did get together, remember the axiom: they end the way they start.

Go with integrity, grasshopper. If she really cares for you, she will come around. Meantime, go date other women.

[Wakeup]

I'm not sure why you would allow yourself to become vulnerable to someone who is already in a legal and commited relationship? If you're going to cheat with someone who cannot commit to you then you should probably just consider it sex and keep your emotions out of it. If you are the type that sex leads you to think you have "feelings" for that person then you best not get yourself involved with someone who is already involved.

I suggest you tell her that you'll not be the "other man" any longer and that she knows where to find you if she actually gets a divorce. Think about just how long that process will take. Once you realize how much time you've wasted and how much more you will waste while you wait for her to be free to be with you, you will realize the folly of your ways.

There are lots of women out there that are free to be with you and make you their No 1, why not look for one of those instead of doing anymore waiting to be No. 1 and settlling to be No. 2? (pun intended)

[misombra]

that's not gonna work out.