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Thread: Think she's blowing me off -how do i pull her back in?!?!!

  1. #1
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    Think she's blowing me off -how do i pull her back in?!?!!

    Hey guys -brand new to this site but I really need advise for the 1st time EVER! lol

    I've been seeing a lot of girls since my relationship ended 3 mo's ago, n normally its no big deal but I met 1 I kinda wldn't mind keeping around n dating on a more exclusive level.

    -The Problem!! -we met at a bar and I was immediately taken away by her beauty, got her #, starting txt'ing tht night (I think she started it), the nex night I spent the night at her house, then the night after that as well and she spent the night at my house the nex 2 nights. thn 2 nights ago was the 1st time we didn't hang out -I needed sleep lol. she's calling me babe, holding my hand every second we'r 2gether, we we'r almost in-seperateable, she's awesome and I really enjoy her. ive been trying to hold back jus a little emotionally so I dnt get ahead of myself, this girl is the s*%# and im afraid of messing it up or maybe I already did somehow. so 2 nights ago whn I stayed in she had called me asking if i was still working of If I had time to stop by b4 she went to work, thn txtd me late (1130 I think) "what r u doin?" I said "jus catchn up on some sleep n had an "off night"" -I had kind of a bad day with work, I kinda was hoping she wld come over and hang out but instead she didn't respond till the nex day "r u ok?" I said "ya im gd! wht u doin 2day?" and ever since she's been blowing me off not answering txt's (or jus half ass answering n keeping it short), wont call and I wanna take my pride and not let it bother me and move on but I was really enjoying her and still want to -HOW DO I PULL HER BACK IN?!!!! please help

  2. #2
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    it sounds counter-productive to your goal but the best thing you can do when someone is running away from you is to stop chasing them. She'll stop and wonder why you're not running after her.

    Don't get yur nads in an uproar. You picked her up in a bar so she may have found a new barmate by now and is just busy until she can get back around to you. *shrugs* all speculation of course but a good way to keep your emotions out of this is to look at it realistically.

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    Maybe she was excited for the first few days and was floating on high until reality set in. I say this because it all happened rather fast. Maybe she is trying to pull away from you a little bit because of this. Hopefully she doesnt have a man or something. As for me being a woman, (I cant speak for others) but normally if I lose interest or something like that there is no way to really pull me back in. I have to want to be in that position with a guy. I would say just give it some time and maybe hit her up here and there until she comes around. I wouldnt suggest blowing her up by text etc because that can become annoying to her. I know it does for me to the point where i get the text but I dont read it if I already know I dont want to communicate with that person. You should really call her though and see whats up with her and maybe arrange a date and then hopefully you two can reconnect or at least you will know whether she wants to be bothered or not.

    Good Luck.

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    ya thts wht I keep trying to tell myself n normally im on the other side of this stupid fence but I may have aloud my self to like her too much even though I was trying to hold bck, I did try to tell myself "its only been 1 weird day out of 4 or 5 but its driving me crazy, normally I wld pull bck n ether she wld start chasing me but more often it jus goes no where n I move on but I dnt want to let this 1 slip away

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    then it sounds like you've met your match in the female form.

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    gd advice n thank u prada, hopefully ur wrong about her not wanting to b pulled bck in, I will chill out 2day, the broncos play n me n the boys r planning on watching it at her bar -we go there a lot -thts how I met her kinda, shes not wrkn today so she may not b there but its a big popular place n even if we dnt re connect we will c each other here n there as we also have mutual friends at tht bar tht we go to about 2-3 times a month n she knows tht.

    the other part I didn't mention is yesterday whn she started blowing me off, she was at her families house n still might but still -no call? no answer? short answers bck in txt? I hate this, y cant we b normal n if we r enjoying something b free to go with it

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    lol -I always feared tht, lol

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    I hate this, y cant we b normal n if we r enjoying something b free to go with it
    I'm sure many-a-chickie-poos have muttered those same words about you.

    The thing to remember is that if she's interested in more than giving you some "stank on your hang low" (just heard a joke with that line in it) then she'd be reallllll happy to hear from you after your night/week/? of sexual shinnanigans. If it peters out then it never was.

    Maybe take things a little slower if you find a beauty (in your eyes) because ya never know when you'll wish you had????

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    wakeup, I shld ad -my success is up for opinion, may look like I do well frm the outside n frm my friends but I wld rather find a quality person and eventually share a committed relationship with some one I can enjoy for a long time if possible, tht is honestly wht I seek -the hussle gets old fast

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    DON'T BE FOCUSED ON "MESSING UP"

    This is the worst approach to dating, and I know from personal experience. In fact, this is the worst approach to every single aspect of life. Stop focusing on "what if" and just accept "what is". Hakuna matata my friend..

    When NASA first sent men to the moon, do you think Neil Armstrong was focused on the space shuttle crashing? NO! He was focused on walking on the moon.

    Do you think Thomas Edison would give up on the 9,999th attempt at creating the incandescent lightbulb? NO! He went for the 10,000th attempt and achieved his goal!

    Barack Obama was the first US president of color. Do you think anyone from the times of African slavery and racial segregation could ever PERCEIVE this? NO! Well Barack Obama won the popular vote.. Two terms in a row!

    What these three men share in common is that they had the desire to achieve their dreams. But, they could only do that with their foundations of having FAITH IN THEMSELVES. They KNEW they could do it. They saw themselves doing this years before it happened. These men were not focused on "messing up" they were FOCUSED ON OVERCOMING ANYTHING THAT STOOD IN THE WAY BETWEEN THEM, AND THEIR GOAL.

    Have some faith in yourself my friend. Don't sweat the "what ifs" and worst case scenarios in dating. If they happen, they happen. You simply have to accept them for what they are and know that it is just part of the path. And even if this particular lady does not want to date you, you simply move on and wish her the best of luck. For we're all human.. And anger, bitterness, and cynicism does NOT solve anything. You will just be sitting on your personal path, making no progress toward the horizon.

    "It's not the dread upon your head, but the love in your heart!" - Sugar Minott

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by LuCsHere View Post
    wakeup, I shld ad -my success is up for opinion, may look like I do well frm the outside n frm my friends but I wld rather find a quality person and eventually share a committed relationship with some one I can enjoy for a long time if possible, tht is honestly wht I seek -the hussle gets old fast
    Then read Alex's advice (as well as taking things a little slower without making scoring your end goal).

    Alex is right ~ "The Power of Positive Thinking" or "The Secret" are two very good books that focus on what Alex is saying. Read them and change it up

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    the last night we spent together at my house I didn't sleep with her -she asked me in a joking way later y I hadn't, I answered tht I wanted to c if we cld enjoy each other without sex for once, n also "if I cld lay nex to such a beautiful woman all night and control my self' thn jokingly expressed how proud of my self for doing so as it was most difficult

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    wow- powerful alex, tht helps to hear

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    Thanks guys, I feel a lot better!

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    With girls like this, you should keep seeing other girls and don't get too close emotionally. You see what happens when you do. Keep seeing other girls, and don't give her your undivided attention, unless she says she wants a relationship. Then you can decide if that's what you want too. Even then, with this type of girl, I'd be weary.

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