Old Flame

[Legend432]

Hi all. I have been dealing with a situation for awhile now and I need a bit of advice. Here goes...

I am 24 years old and have been in a relationship for almost two years now. Our relationship began at a time in my life where I was very active socially (I was in college). Despite being part of a fraternity, I was never one to try for a casual hook-up as many others were... I was much more interested in finding someone that I wanted a relationship with. In the few months before we started dating, my feelings shifted on and off between two girls... one of which is my girlfriend now.

Herein lies the problem... before I began dating my girlfriend, I had all but decided that the other girl (we'll call her Stacy) was who I really wanted to be with. We had been talking as more than friends for awhile. I knew that she liked me and I hope that we would eventually start dating. Then one night we were at a party hanging out having a great time together. We had spent time together before, but this was different. I thought everything was perfect and that this was the start of something great. I was on top of the world. But to make the long story short, that very same night, she wound up doing something that hurt me very badly. I stopped talking to her after this for a long time... for awhile just seeing her was hard. Eventually I reached the point where we could talk again without it being weird, but it took awhile.

About a month later I began dating my girlfriend. It was comforting to have someone and I really did like her... but looking back I question whether this was the right move as I was definitely not over Stacy. For the first few months, aside from a few fights, everything was great. Eventually every relationship runs into its issues, but after a year or so of dating, things began to go downhill. We fought constantly and the trust began to disappear. Then a couple of months ago, Stacy and her boyfriend of more than a year broke up. Old feelings had been threatening to resurface for awhile now and this wound up making it happen. Since then I have become very distant from my relationship and my girlfriend has taken notice. I would never cheat but I have thoughts about Stacy very often.

Bottom line: I don't know what to do. Though our relationship is not great, I care about my girlfriend a lot and don't want to hurt her. At the same time I don't want to jerk her around. Stacy is now single and has grown up a great deal in the past couple of years.

Advice?

[HeartIsAching]

Who'd Stacy ****?

Your current GF is a rebound that you settled for. It's only been two years, do the right thing and break it off.

[April999]

If you still have lingering feelings for this other girl after all this time chances are you wont forget about it. I agree with HeartIsAching..... break it off. If you don't and you can't forget about Stacy then you will be hurting your current gf anyway in the long run.

[rob1984]

arrrrr mate, dis time to walk de plank and jump ship. Do yourself and her self a favour... now do not get with stacy then down the road, say you miss you ex

[michelle23]

Break up with your gf and let her go..

And get over Stacey. That is the best advice I can give you.

Stay away from both these girls and figure out what you want in a woman.