Getting it out before i scream (dont have to read it all )

[Lorrie2210]

I have been in a 7 /8year relationship who i met when my youngest was 8months old.(i have three children) hes never wanted kids of his own which isn't really a problem. He got made redundant 3/4 years ago and a year ago his mum died so i know hes had some pressure. since being made redundant he has just played pc all night and is in bed all day he moans all the time and i feel id rather not discuss things with him ie decorating/the kids/ as i never get any support just negativitybecause i do everything wrong.

the only time he seems to take an interest in the kids is when they do something wrong for instance he said to my teen daughter to bring a bowl down from her room. like this: " you need to bring your bowl down from your room, i told you last night to bring it down when your finished you wont be allowed to have anything again if you cant do a simple thing your not supposed to eat up there anyway so bring it down now" in a really condescending voice which pees me off never mind my daughter, and he just goes on and on. every time they do something wrong he always tells and never asks them to do anything.

the other night my daughter and friend (who my partner said shouldnt sleep cos they always get into trouble together) came in early as all their friends were drinking we have had problems with my teen so this was a real step forward i was so proud of her i treated them to loads of treats and they watched a movie all he said was yh its good and barely looked up from his computer

He has always been a negative person but since i have been diagnosed with depression its dragging me down and sometimes i hate him..most days i don't even want him to get up cos then we will have to talk.

yesterday was my birthday and i was making some flat pack furniture (something i love doing) and he got up and started moaning about how he thought it was going to be different and now my son wont have any space in his room essentially turning something i was enjoying into a chore and thats the effect he has on everything. he does nothing which he denies but i still have three children to look after ive started an avon round i take an interest in healthy eating (cook from scratch) its too much for me i know my job wont change wether hes here or not but just to not have the constant moaning/questioning of what im doing im a grown woman i dont know it all but i can make educated decisions and i dont see why he needs to understand everything i do

I wanted a Partner a Friend a Lover i didn't want a father

[Boisdevie]

Well stop ****ing complaining and dump him then.

[Valixy]

Lorrie, if you could raise your children on your own, you should do that. Some single mothers find themselves in a very bad personal or economical situation and feel that they have to put up with just any negative partner for years, but this is not your case. The pressure you feel is also felt by your children, they actually feel it much more than you do, and it isn't fair on them to put up with this year after year. If you can raise them on your own, do that and find yourself a nice lover on the side. Only a wonderful man who really suits you and your family needs should become a partner for you and assume a father figure for your kids.

[smackie9]

Kids are very perceptive of their enviroment and when it's negative they react to it. They know you are unhappy, unsatisfied, angry, frustrated, and feeling unappreciated. Things will change for the better with them and your attitude when you take him out of the picture.

You knew you were going to hear this response, it's time to face the music, you need to kick his ass out and get social assistance til you get back on your feet. BTW if 2 of your kids are teenagers they can get off their lazy asses and get a part time job or go wash windows or do chores for an elderly neighbour, maybe a paper route. Everyone should pitch in.