Should I cancel my plans with her and move on?

[Secretsquirrel]

So me and a few friends have organised a series of dinner parties over the last few weeks and I invited this girl I knew from the gym - who I've always liked. Two weeks ago we made out and I was really happy. We went on a date, we kissed again. I saw her again on the Monday and Tuesday and walked home with her from the gym.

Then on Wednesday she gave me this speech about how she wanted to be friends at this coming Saturdays dinner. She said a few months ago she came out of a relationship. She says she really likes it when we are in the gym together but wants we independence. We are cooking.

What should I do? Should I cancel on her? Yes I like her, but if it's going nowhere I will kind of feel like a chump bringing her along as 'friends' when I thought there could be so much more. What should I do?

Help!!!!!

[Kromat83]

You sometimes think something will develop, but if the other person doesn't feel it, no sense to force it and try to convince her, since she already gave you the speech.
These feelings will fade, you just need a different mindset and just appreciate her for the person she is and stay friends with her if you wish, but what you do is up to you.
Socialize with others, and it'll work out in the end, as there is no sense wasting your time on someone that doesn't want the same thing as you.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Definitely cancel on her. Tell her if she changes her mind about things, to let you know, but you're not going to waste time being friends with someone you like as more. She should understand. Don't be all buddy-buddy with her at the gym either. Speak when spoken to, but keep it short.

If you don't want to be her chump, don't be.

[Wakeup]

^^ I agree. You don't want to be her male-girlfriend. You can invite a male buddy and at least have fun and comraderie. You don't need her to be your "empty seat filler" Tell her you have enough friends at the moment and you were looking for more then what she's willing to offer.

[smackie9]

I say screw the relationship crap and just bang her. If she says she doesn't want a relationship there is no reason why sex should be off the table.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

^^^Agreed. Tell her you are open to going to the dinner as friends with benefits. That one sentence will take care of everything.

[Wakeup]

You guys say that like a sexual relationship was actually in the offering when it wasn't.

Adding: You like her and I assume thats why you actually asked her on a date like activity

Then on Wednesday she gave me this speech about how she wanted to be friends at this coming Saturdays dinner.

If you want her as a FB then Invite someone else and just keep ****ing her to just that, ****ing.

In and out. No bonding rituals like cooking together and being your dinner date. I agree that coming right out and suggesting that you are open to FWB's while reiterating that just a platonic friend you can do without. At least then you're still not being her MALE-girlfriend.

[smackie9]

He just needs to back off the attention and she will find herself making out with him again....nothing needs to be discussed when she whispers in his ear your place or mine.