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Thread: 32 falling for a 17 y.o. girl

  1. #1
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    32 falling for a 17 y.o. girl

    hi.

    im 32 and im kinda falling for this 17 y.o. girl.
    we met online never met in real life.

    im way under developed emotionally for my age,
    i mean i dont feel like i have the maturity someone
    my age should have, on the other hand i feel
    she is over developed emotionally for her age,
    being she's gone through some really bad sexual
    experiences that are illegal and related to her family somehow.

    i feel like she;s got a lot of baggage, and so do i.

    also, we;re very separated by distance, in addition to the age thing.

    but i like her and she likes me.

    i constantly think of how and when the thing will fail and we will break up.

    however for now it seems to be working ok..

    im very confused, im realize she's a symbol of my youth
    and im a symbol of her father, but still its there, the feelings,
    the attraction.

    im not asking for an advice, cuz i know how wrong it is.
    what im curious is if someone else has experienced such a thing.

    obviously, im distressed by the fact that she's not 18 yet,
    but when she will be, would it really make any diff? apart from the fact
    that she would be ...18....


    thanx.
    Last edited by lancelot1982; 22-01-15 at 02:11 PM.

  2. #2
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    My advice would be: dont tear yourself up like that. Love does not have an age limit and you cant controll what you feel. Ive never experienced something similiar to your current situation but If i were you i would set up a meeting in real life. See if the connection youve built through online chatting lasts. Get to know her. People are always slightly different in real than they act behind their safe desk. Once you got to know each other in real and If you 2 connect and youre happy and in love. Why not?

    (Wait till she's 18 though ;])

  3. #3
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    You can't see how unhealthy this is which is frightening. You both are both dysfunctional and either of you don't have to the capability to deal with these issues. A sexually abused girl typically will seek refuge with a man much older than her, and doesn't make the best decisions. It other words she doesn't know any better, she's confused and very vulnerable. With your age, your lack of maturity and selfish needs will only exasperate her psychological issues. You sir are a predator. I don't care how you paint yourself, predators manipulate the weak, innocent and vulnerable. Claiming to be not of a mental state of a 32 year old doesn't exclude you from how wrong what you are doing is. You are a danger to this girl. She doesn't need you she needs a professional therapist.

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    Agreeing with smackie here. . You admit it yourself that she has issues.. maybe be a responsible adult and help her deal with them or help her find someone who can help her rather than taking advantage of her "daddy issues" and making her problems more pronounced! I for one really hope that its an undercover cop you've been chatting up! How can you expect to have a relationship with her when she turns 18?? Let the poor girl sort out her shit and if it really is true love force yourself to step aside from any romantic inclinations until you both can get over your individual issues.. please dont fk this girl up even more!!!!

    - - - Updated - - -

    In addition just wanted to add that I have been in the 17 yr old girls shoes and had sexual issues the same and trust me... DO NOT be the reason this girl breaks! You will only make things worse for you both!!

  5. #5
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    This is just chatting. They never met in real life so whats a big deal?

    I think guy is just lonely and lazy thats why he settles for this 17 year old girl.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  6. #6
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    Ever seen the show To Catch a Predator? You dont want to be on it. Stay away until she is older and remember you cannot fall for someone until you actually meet them. Chatting online can be fun but doesn't count as dating.

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    you're making me feel like i'm such an awful person :|

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    You can't use your emotional immaturity as an excuse; at the end of the day, you're still 32. If a paedophile stood up in court and said 'well I FEEL 10 years old so it's okay', how do you think that would go down?

    Also, this whole thing is a waste of time anyway. You haven't met in real life and if you did, what do you think would happen? Wedding bells and chimes? It wouldn't work out regardless so you're investing energy into a mere fantasy. She's a teenage girl and you're a grown man who needs to pull his socks up and act like it.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by lancelot1982 View Post
    hi.

    im 32 and im kinda falling for this 17 y.o. girl.
    we met online never met in real life.

    im way under developed emotionally for my age,
    i mean i dont feel like i have the maturity someone
    my age should have,
    You should go out with a 32 y/o woman who is emotionally immature like you fukcing jerk! Internet predators like you should have their assess incarcerated and rape in prison.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Myobsession View Post
    My advice would be: dont tear yourself up like that. Love does not have an age limit and you cant controll what you feel. Ive never experienced something similiar to your current situation but If i were you i would set up a meeting in real life. See if the connection youve built through online chatting lasts. Get to know her. People are always slightly different in real than they act behind their safe desk. Once you got to know each other in real and If you 2 connect and youre happy and in love. Why not?

    (Wait till she's 18 though ;])
    Another stupid moron! Keep your retarded advice to yourself dumbass!

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    The right thing to do here would be to cut her off. Block all forms of communication and you will get over her. Its v simple really since you never met in real life. Just stay away and start talking to someone older. You will soon forget her. Shes still a child and she js v vulnerable considering what she has been through. And sexual abuse does NOT make a person more mature, it actually hinders and slows down their development. They are stuck, frozen at that age mentally and emotionally until they get the treatment they need.
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

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    Lol. I get that everyone has his own opinion but youre being rude and immature...

  12. #12
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    You aren't an awful person, but this is an unrealistic situation that will likely never work out and that at this time is illegal if it goes too far. You sound like you are having a rough time, experiencing some sort of depression or low self esteem and you should work on pulling yourself out of it instead of getting into an unhealthy online "relationship." Is there harm in continuing to talk to her until she turns 18 and then maybe trying to make something happen in real life? I dont really know for sure but it does not seem like a good idea at all.

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    I think even at 18 y.o she would be still so young for you at 32 y.o doesn't matter if you are emotionally immature, I am sure you can find an emotionally immature 25 y.o easily too.
    (≚ᄌ≚)ℒℴѵℯ

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    Quote Originally Posted by Myobsession View Post
    Lol. I get that everyone has his own opinion but youre being rude and immature...
    I'm not being rude... I'm simply expressing my opinion of you based on your idiotic advice... That you are an imbecile, dull witted, obtuse, etc. person. You get the picture, I hope? Maybe not.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Myobsession View Post
    Lol. I get that everyone has his own opinion but youre being rude and immature...
    I'm not being rude... I'm simply expressing my opinion of you based on your idiotic advice... That you are an imbecile, dull witted, obtuse, etc. person. You get the picture, I hope? Maybe not.

  15. #15
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    i see some people here mastered life so well, and are in such a harmony with what life and love means, that they just felt compelled to share their views by swearing at me and calling me names and thus proving that indeed they are more mature emotionally or mentally or whatever, so that they can advice the awful human being that i am. i thank them, for shoving their wisdom down my throat and making me think who's more sane, me or them.

    btw, i broke up with her.

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