What is she thinking??

[Temple]

Met this girl about a year ago. We spent several months texting, calling, hung out a few times, but never officially started dating. It never had a 'friends only' vibe either. She's a single mom with a 2 year old so it always seemed like we were getting to know each other before deciding what we wanted to be. It was going well for a while, she would initiate texts/calls/lunch, use lots of emojis, laugh at my jokes, etc. Then about 3-4 months ago, seemingly for no reason at all and literally overnight, she became more distant. She responded less frequently and less often, she didn't joke around in her texts like she used to, etc. Finally, I asked about it a couple weeks ago. She said that she had a lot going on with her daughter, her uncle died, she started a new job with long hours, and that she didn't think she was ready for a relationship right now and didn't want to lead me on. A day or two later I wrote her a letter saying I really liked her, if she wasn't ready to date right now I'd wait, and told her how great I thought she was. She texted me immediately after reading it and only said 'thanks'. I tried calling her a few days later, but she was busy and said she would call the next day. She did call and we talked for a few minutes but she seemed distant or guarded. She was driving home and had her daughter to get in and fed dinner so I don't know if she was just multitasking and distracted. In the week or two since then I have been texting her most days and she texts back right away, quicker than she ever did before, but the texts are usually just to the point. However, she still isn't as playful as she once was. I'm not sure if that was so long ago (3-4 months) that she needs time to get used to me again or what is going on. Is she sorting things out, not interested, adjusting to me liking her,....I just don't know.

[basilandthyme]

You have to partially read between the lines on her letter. First and foremost, it was a breakup letter. The bit about not being ready for a relationship translates to "you're not the guy for me". The bit about not wanting to lead you on means exactly what it says: She doesn't want you to get the idea that there's a future for the both of you together.

I can't see that she wants you to wait for her. You can wait if you want, but if she's not interested - you may be waiting forever.

[Khocie]

She is really busy and might not like you like you like her, she sounds like a sweet person who would not say it straight to your face to back off but I think it is obvious that she is too busy for you and sweet enough to reply you when you text her.

[LunV93]

There are two options: she doesn't want a serious relationship with you and she doesn't want to lead you on, or she is really busy. We honestly can't know the real answer so why don't you ask her? it could be awkward but you could find out the real problem

[Temple]

Yeah, I know I should just ask her and that's what I plan to do. She's just being very confusing right now. To clarify a bit more, she told me that she wasn't looking for a relationship b/c of everything she had going on & b/c she had been hurt in the past (that was more reading between the lines but very obvious). That same conversation she was very engaged and asking me lots of questions about what was going on in my life. A couple days later I sent her the letter telling her how I feel. She replied simply with 'thanks for the email'. The following week is when she called me. And this past week I have texted her a few times with simple stuff, like have a nice day, etc. & she texts back almost immediately. She never texted back that quickly before, although the responses aren't very conversational. Am I just being thick, or is she sending mixed signals? If I really do like, care about, & want to be with her, what can I do?