Need advice for a confusing situation?

[Maple1714]

Why do you say that?

B/c you are clearly rationalizing the situation into something that it is not. He says he isn't interested in a relationship and you are still finding hope. No matter how hard it is, you need to try and move on. DO NOT contact him. There is nothing more annoying than getting "pleading" texts/messages of any sort from someone you are trying to break up with. I am very sorry you are going through this, I know its hard.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

He asked you to leave him alone and you won't. You keep manufacturing reasons contact him, instead of respecting his wishes. When you do contact him, it's generally rambling, incoherent and irrational things you're dumping on him, hence him not knowing how to reply. Save your dignity already, geez. HE DOES NOT WANT YOU! It sucks, but you'll live, and there are plenty of other people out there. If you weren't a [crazy] control freak, he'd proabbly still be with you. You realize this, but you still refuse to give up the crazy, control freakness.

[imadesklamp]

That is understandable.. If he gave me a straight answer, then I wouldn't be trying so hard. But he had to say we "might" get back together someday in there. I would honestly rather him say that it's over so I know for sure. I'm not planning on contacting him anymore. And I guess it just confuses me that how he said we could work all of this out and make it all right and that he would love me forever literally two days before we broke up. It just is confusing to me, but I'm trying my best to just forget about it from now on until he contacts me.

[imadesklamp]

I'm not a crazy control freak. I was very tolerate with him in our relationship, even though I has a problem with pushing the future on him. If he didn't want me, he would have told me straight up instead of saying he will get back to me eventually. I honestly don't think he would just throw three years of loving me out the window, but I don't know. I already said I don't plan on contacting him anymore.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

I'm not a crazy control freak. I was very tolerate with him in our relationship, even though I has a problem with pushing the future on him. If he didn't want me, he would have told me straight up instead of saying he will get back to me eventually. I honestly don't think he would just throw three years of loving me out the window, but I don't know. I already said I don't plan on contacting him anymore.

You also said you weren't contacting him anymore, as you'd done all you could do, yesterday. Then you called him and left a psycho voicemail. You are a control freak or else you wouldn't be 'forcing the future' on him, and now trying to force him to talk to you.

Delusional.

Psycho.

Control freak.

Crazy.

Did I leave anything out?

He's not throwing out 3 years of loving you. He's just moving on.

[imadesklamp]

These insults don't make me feel any better.. I already have enough low self esteem as it is and I feel horrible about all of this. I'm not forcing him to talk to me. I told him in the voicemail I don't expect him to answer me right now. I realize doing that was a mistake, yes. I was contemplating on doing that for hours and now I regret it. Like I said, I have a lot of growing up to do and that is something I need to change.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

They're not insults, and they're certainly not supposed to make you feel better. I'm just telling you what traits I'm seeing, and what I think when I see behavior like yours, since that's probably what drove him off.

My point is, bullshitting yourself isn't going to help you. Best to just start moving on and if he comes back, deal with it then.

If you have low self esteem, you need to do something to raise it. Hobbies and the like.

What did you mean by pushing the future on him btw?

[imadesklamp]

I was never like this throughout the time we were dating. I never asked for him to see me all the time, I never asked for his attention 24/7, I never asked him to call me, I let him get drunk and high with people he hardly knows nearly every night, and I was more than willing to sit around with him and watch him play Xbox all the time because we both didn't mind doing that (he preferred that anyways, he hates going out).

I honestly don't know why I'm acting so crazy right now, and I hate it. I realize I need to move on and just wait for him to come back at some point.

And by pushing the future on him, I meant that I was worrying too much about what might happen and whatnot. A week before all of this happened, he had told me that although he would like to stay with me forever, he would prefer not to talk about it and live in the present with me and take things as they go. I was reluctant to accepting it at first, but I eventually excepted it. Two days before we broke up, he had randomly told me that one thing he does know for a fact is that he would love me forever. Hearing this, I thought it was okay to tell him that I still wanted to be with him forever. He told me talking about this made him uncomfortable and I didn't really understand why. We fought about it for two hours that night and it was ridiculous. I realize that I really should not have done that.. but it just confused me as he had willingly mentioned it the day before?

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Moving on means not waiting for him to come back.

[imadesklamp]

Moving on means not waiting for him to come back.

True. I'll just try and move on and if he comes back, then he comes back.