Aliquis,
One POSSIBLE reason she hit you with the "no time for a relationship" line is that you were too strong upfront man. I mean you haven't seen her in forever and let's not forget that according to what you tell us, you turned down her advances for 7 months. Women are gentle beings who get quite disillusioned when a man does not fancy her, particularly when she is the one making the moves.
As a learning experience, here are a few pointers...
I never told you this but I like you a lot and my feelings grew stronger the more I got to know you. I never made this clear to you because I was afraid of messing it up and I guess I was shy too. I like you a lot is not that much different from I love you, and frankly, it's WAY too early for this...WHY??? B/C you don't even know her situation, her environment. Does she have a boyfriend? Was she recently in a tough relationship? You don't know, so don't come at her with all this out of the blue.
So do you want to go for a coffee or a drink sometime? This was actually a great event to invite her to except for the fact that it was preceded by your grand declaration of love. ONE THING: Next time, don't ask it so much as tell her you want to do something nice for her. TRY: I want to take you for coffee sometime. I have a special place that I know you will enjoy.
Her: Hey {my name}, i dont know how to tell u this but right now i' just too busy at this point in my life, and i am not looking for any kind of relationship. Sorry if i'm blunt but i'd rather tell the truth Her way of saying I am shocked by you telling me this out of the blue...AND...she may INDEED be really busy and not looking for a relationship. This is what I mean by understanding a woman's environment before you go all Shakespeare on her. Does she have a bf? Does she have kids? Does she work ridiculous hours? All these are possible reasons for why she might not have time for a serious relationship, but may have time for a more casual affair.
Me: I understand
Me: I'm not a needy person... but if you dont like me just say it, I can take rejection Ok bro, I'm not trying to bust your chops too much, but by telling her "I'm not a needy person" you have just told her "HEY! Check out the new post it note on my forehead. It screams "I am a needy person!" Stay away from this phrase...ALWAYS.
Her: Thats not the point, what i said is what i meant.
Me: ok, you know where to find me if you change your mind Wait, is she pursuing you? No sir, it is you that is trying to go after her so let's forget this whole "you know where to find me" fiasco. What does this say about you as a man? That you give up easy. Maybe that you just kind of see where the "wind blows" things. That your work is done after that short text. That it's her MOVE?
My man, in the jungle of Romance, man has to step up to the plate and swing for the fences, particularly when he is very much into a particular woman. DETERMINATION. Now, that doesn't mean you become PUSHY. It just means that you apply steady but gentle pressure on her to at least buy yourself the opportunity to have her recognize just how damn good of a man you are.
Then and only then, is it her move.
You were a good sport about posting this so cheers for that. Time to refocus and revamp if this is a girl you really want to pursue.
Keep your head up champ,
Baby Be Social