Calling him dude...

[LailaK]

There is this boy I am in deep deep lust with. Every time I think about him or talk to him I just want to rip all his clothes off. This is strange for me because I have been celibate for over 2 years, saving myself for someone I have a connection with.

Anywho the guy I'm in lust with doesn't seem to like me very much. I usually initiate conversation. We went out on a first date and he didn't ask for a second. Every once in a while he writes something on my FB status but that's the extent of it. I completely understand that the guy is just "not that into me." So why would he get upset when I call him dude? It's a stupid thing to get upset over.

Dude is something I call men that I've specifically put in my friend zone. It's a word usually reserved for guys who rejected me. When I utter the word it's like a stake in the ground. I am proclaiming to myself and to him that he is a dude, a friend and lustful thoughts need to stop. My bff says that no guy likes it when a girl calls him dude and I know this which is why I'm doing it. She says that I'm being passive aggressive. I think it's no big deal. It's just a word! Dude!

[Doc Durian]

This should explain things...

[LailaK]

LOL! I really like that video, it's awesome.

I'm still going to call him dude.

[Doc Durian]

^^^ Passive aggressive

[SirWagginston]

I never knew the word "dude" had so many strings attached. I thought it was just... dude.

[nowomannocry]

she called me dude before starting the slow, torturous process of leaving me.

as if she were ever there anyway... never finding love online again.

[vashti]

I thought "dude" was pretty much the exclusive verbal property of 15 year old boys?

[misombra]

i broke up with a guy once cause he called me dude. i fuking hated everything everytime he said it. it's too bad cause he was a nice guy.

[lastwish]

This guy is...weird. Dude is just another term used for a guy.

[doppelgaenger]

Do you like being called names? It's kind of annoying.

[LailaK]

I'm a Californian through and through. I say hella and I say dude. I pretty much refer to everyone as dude unless they are: My mother, my father, my boss, my romantic interest. Calling a guy "dude" is an efficient way of placing him in the friendzone box, even if it is a bit passive aggressive.

As for name calling, he calls me "shorty". I don't hate it but I don't love it.

[doppelgaenger]

A lot of people say dude and hella. But from the way you write, it doesn't really seem like you'd be one of those Californian boneheads that say "Like, dude, like totally, like yeah dude."
In fact, you're admitting that you're consciously, purposefully calling him dude to remind yourself that he's just a friend and that you don't want to pursue him, even though you really lust for him. Sounds like you're just calling him dude because you're angry that he isn't going after you or giving you attention.

Do you like it when guys call you chick or girl? What about ho? Same thing, basically.

[vashti]

I live in California, too, and believe me, we don't all say "dude"... only the kids do it where I live.

Also, "chick" and "girl" are NOT synonymous with "ho".

[LailaK]

No, I say dude all the time. Just because a person says dude doesn't make them stupid or their vocabulary tiny. I don't say "totally" or "like" but I've been known to drop an "omg" or even an "omg DUDE!" from time to time. I'm 24. Maybe that has something to do with it.

I actually don't care if a guy calls me "chick" or "girl". I'd probably respond by calling him "dude" or "boy". No biggie.

I call groups women "chicks". Women I don't know are "chicks" as in "That chick is crazy." or "Those chicks over there are all on your jock, dude!"

To me that's not name calling but who knows, I could be wrong.

I wouldn't want to be called a bitch or a ho (I don't act like a bitch or a ho) but I wouldn't call this dude an asshole or a prick because he's generally a nice guy. He just doesn't like me therefore it makes me feel better to call him dude.

[Asip4u]

So dumb how some people get upset over little things like this.