she say's she isnt ready

[karl84]

Ok me and my ex was together for 8 years have 2 kids and 1 more that didnt make it.We split last year well its been 13 months.Well for the past few months say 4 we have kinda been fwb.Well one day we was riding in the car and she stated that she been thinking about us getting a new place.I have been asking what going on with me and her for the last 3 months caus ei cant keep doing this fwb that where she and kids stay the night kinda like we all live together for a few days we go out hold hands have sex but when i ask her about us she say she isnt rdy.she says i have changed and thats a plus and that if she wanted anyone else i would be the first to kno so we could end our fwb she says.so how do i got about this and thx for the help

[BackUpOrGetStng]

End the FWB situation and start no contact with her. Tell her you're not dealing with her or her kids in anyway unless she wants a committed relationship.

[smackie9]

She is just using you and wants to use you further.....get out for you are just kidding yourself if you think there's a possibility to get back into a committed relationship.

[qwertz]

End the FWB situation and start no contact with her. Tell her you're not dealing with her or her kids in anyway unless she wants a committed relationship.

What the fcuk?! They have children together, why should they suffer because the parents cant have boundaries?!

OP, i think the way to go would be to stop the fwb, only have contact with her when it is to do with your children, you need boundaries- for their sake if not your own...it must be confusing for them.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

What the fcuk?! They have children together, why should they suffer because the parents cant have boundaries?!

Scorched Earth.

[ShellyZ]

Tell her you're not dealing with her or her kids in anyway unless she wants a committed relationship.

HER kids?! You mean THEIR kids. He can walk away from his relationship with this woman at any time, but he can't walk away from his relationship with his kids. At the very least, he would be required to pay child support.

[karl84]

Yes thx guys it our kids not some random guys kids.I did have NC with her for a few months when i was dating then she called and wanted to stay the night we chatted it up.I mean the sex is still great for me and she says the same.But i dont wanna be fwb i wanna move on with our lifes as a family and want us back together so how should i go about this.

[smackie9]

Ask her if she would go to couples counseling with you to work out any issues. If she refuses, she pretty much is refusing the idea of being back together, so there is nothing else you can do. You can't force someone to be with you....that decision is theirs and theirs alone.

[karl84]

Ok well she wont really tlak to me about this whole thang.She tells me she not rdy still she dont want any1 not just me any1.So i pull the what have we been doing she says ****ing.I say it more then that kissing having sex cuddling in bed hell she thought she was pregnant again by me not to long ago and she was rdy to move on with us again but it came back no and she went distant again what the hell is going on this is driving me crazy.

[smackie9]

She is doing it because she is afraid of being alone. She is not waiting to "feel ready" to start all over with you like you think. You are not keeping her by having sex with her. She can turn and dump you just like that when she meets someone else. You are being used.