Conflicted in Love

[Lostinlove23]

I've been with my boyfriend for three years now. We met when we were teenagers and I'm now 20 years old. I love this man a lot And he is the person I can see myself settling down with the future. The problem is however, I find myself attracted to other guys Who are also attracted to me. I've been faithful the whole three years of our relationship Minus a few flirtatious text messages Which were honestly harmless. He on the other hand Has made a few mistakes Which I've forgiven him for. Never intercourse however, if that makes a difference. Point is, I find myself attracted to this one guy who unintentionally gave me a hickey while playing truth or dare a while back. I know it was wrong for me to even be playing that type of game, but it just happened while a group of friends and I were all hanging around. He was just supposed to lick me on my neck but he kept going and I didn't stop him right away cuz to be honest, it felt kinda good :/ now I'm here thinking about it and wondering what I should do. I'm not a cheater unless u consider that one little mishap cheating. But under normal circumstances that never would of happened. I say this to say that I'm not going to Intentionally cheat on my boyfriend. But I can't stop thinking about this other guy. Should I ignore these thoughts and stick it out with my boyfriend? Or should I break up with him to go explore these feelings I'm having?

[4 ratties]

Break up to explore.
You are only 20. You are curious and have a lot of life in you. Don't waste these years tied to one guy. Go have fun and get it out of you. Just don't get pregnant

[Walter IV]

Hi dear. I'm sorry to hear you're torn. I just recently broke up with woman I was dating for 6 years. And from my experience. And this is completely a personal opinion, I feel that if you have feelings for someone else and consciously acted on those feelings... Even if you don't consider it cheating. It still puts a bad seed in the relationship. You decide whether to feed it or not. There's a hopeful part of me that says if you're completely honest with yourself and with your spouse you may be able to get the seed out before it's roots sets in.

Sent from my SM-N900V using Tapatalk

[michelle23]

Break up. Neither of you are ready for a serious relationship. You have both cheated and this relationship is not healthy.

[Wakeup]

You're not ready for a serious relationship. Not with the bf or the guy you let suck your neck so if you're going to break up with Bf, then don't do it to be with the vampire. He's not shown you in any way whatsoever that he wants you to be his girlfriend.

[TheEvilJester]

It sounds to me like you are perhaps not 100% sure of your relationship with your boyfriend, but you don't like being not sure. You want to be sure, but if you are thinking of other guys, or even just one other guy, then it is obvious you are not 100% committed to the relationship, even if you may want to be. I mean, it is normal to sometimes find others attractive. You can't help that. But, the fact that you find yourself interested in somebody else says that maybe you are not entirely happy with your relationship.

I can't necessarily agree that this DEFINITELY means you should end your relationship with your long-term boyfriend. That has to be your decision. But, I will say that is seems like the other responses above probably are correct. You probably should have a talk with your boyfriend and end the relationship. He has cheated, you have, at the very least, emotionally cheated and possibly physically considering that not so innocent "dare" situation. After all, it is just a game. You should not have allowed that.

Again, though, it really needs to be your decision. You need to do some serious thinking about what you want and why. That, and also think seriously about why your thoughts are straying somewhat from your relationship. Because, sometimes people do stray when they don't mean to over things that can be fixed. It isn't always a foregone conclusion that once your thoughts start to stray that means the relationship is over. It just isn't a very good sign. So, you need to do some serious soul-searching and decide what you want out of life... and whether that means staying with your boyfriend (only if you can do so without straying) or ending the relationship.

If you do break up, I would not advise rushing into another relationship. Give yourself time to reflect on you first. Either way, good luck.