Meeting new people!! Dating help!

[babycarrot]

I know this is long... but it is in depth, and interesting story so please help me out...
Despite the fact that I just got out of a 2 1/2 year relationship 2 weeks ago! I met someone... well I've met a lot of people, but there is one in particular that let's say... I'm interested in.

And the story goes...
I went to hang out with my friends from work, and while hanging out with them I met this new guy, we'll call him Steve, well automatically I was attracted to Steve, and the entire night he was going out of his way to involve me in everything, even tho I was new to these people. We went over to my other friends house and he came along, and tried to get to know me. My friend wanted to ditch out early, and my car was back at his place so we drove back there, and as I was pulling out of the driveway, Steve comes up and asks me to come over. I was sort of worried, because Im not used to this, and didnt know if he was trying to get me into bed, but I found him so intriguing I really wanted to go. We ended up talking fairly late, as I left he asked me for my number saying we should hang out sometime.
Well, the next day my friends (also his friends) were asking me to go to his house for a get together, so I ended up going back that night as well.. he came and sat next to me right when I got there, and we were all talking in the group... I got really drunk, and I found out later that he told his bestfriend that he really liked me but didnt want to take advantage of me because the state I was in... everyone ended up leaving, and we sat around talking till about 8am, by then I was sober (hungover) and extremely tired, so I was on my way out, he asked (all shy) if he could have a hug, and asked if i would go to the movies with him, and asked if we could do this next week... I was excited... and agreeed to this.
But it has been a week since this happened... and still no call... HIS friends came into my work last friday trying to persuade me to call him and/or hang out with them so they could invite him too, and asking me all these things about what i think about him, telling me how he thinks I'm really cool. When I asked why he didnt call, they said that his ex girlfriend (abck from the military) just flew back into town for the next week before leaving to Iraq, and no one has seen Steve since. They left saying that they would persuade him to call me...
So my question is... Do I call Steve (he never gave me his number)? Do I ask his friends what is up? Do I say **** it, and wait for him to call (if ever)? Or try to get my friends who know his friends to hang out so i can see him again? Or what?? Im open to ideas, and open to reasons WHY a guy would do this...

[sfalexi]

I know this is long... but it is in depth, and interesting story so please help me out...

Not that long. Actually, MUCH shorter than a lot of other posts I've seen

Well, in the beginning he sounded like a pretty stand-up guy. However the thing in this story that kinda gets me to think something might be a little strange is this . . .

When I asked why he didnt call, they said that his ex girlfriend (abck from the military) just flew back into town for the next week before leaving to Iraq, and no one has seen Steve since.

Are you comfortable with the thought that maybe he's not around cause he's too busy with the ex? God knows what they're doing, but if she's SO important to him that he will literally cut out the rest of his life (and his friends) for that ONE week with her, is that something you really want to get into? Answer that before you decide whether to give him a call back. And if you do give him a call back, find out right away what he's been doing and why he didn't call. See if he tells you he was with his ex or if he says something else. Find out the situation with his ex (why'd they break up? Was it cause she had to leave and go to the military? Cause if so then maybe he didn't WANT to break up and so still wants her . . .)

Also, two weeks? Are you sure you don't need some more time off to make sure that something doesn't end up being the rebound? You know yourself better than me, but two weeks seems a little strange. Maybe you just instantly starting falling for the first guy that paid attention to you and seemed like he could get you back into a relationship . . . just wondering . . .

Alexi

[jslaughter]

Okay, I am with Alexi who has proven often to be wise beyond his years - if you just got out of a relationship you probably need some time and space before you rush head first into another one, but . . .

When I was in a similar situation my girlfriends took me out where I met this really cute guy named Brian. He flirted shamelessly with me, we danced, and he even went in for a kiss at the end of the evening - - - I was walking on air and then a few days later I was practically doused with cold water - I found out Brian was MARRIED! I felt terrible at first, kind of like a home wrecker, and then I realized I didn't know so it wasn't really my fault.

However, what I did know is that after the end of a relationship where I felt battered, unattractive, and drained in one evening this man reminded me I was beautiful, charming, and sexy - - so it turned into a joke with me and my girlfriends - when someone first breaks up and does something a little silly with some guy they just met - we say "everyone needs a Brian!"

Take the evening for what it was, and don't let the future worry you too much. If he has hooked back up with his ex - that's his problem not yours.

-J

[babycarrot]

Okay
So a new update to this is that my friend is his bestfriend's girlfriend, and she saw him and I guess he was talking about hanging out with me late this weekend. This weekend is also the weekend that his ex flies out to Iraq. Coincendence? Doubt it. But anyway, my next question is: Why would someone act SOOOO interested, talk to all his friends about how cool you are, and then not call?

[jslaughter]

my next question is: Why would someone act SOOOO interested, talk to all his friends about how cool you are, and then not call?

Because BOYS are ICKY - Sugar, you need to find yourself a MAN!

[WindyCityLane]

BC,

I have a lot of thoughts about this. You guys just met. He's interested in you but you guys don't have enough history for him to blow off time with someone he knows he cares about that he only has a short time with. Why he and his ex-girl are exes is more important. If it is because she is in the service, that would concern me that he would have mixed feelings about the two of you every time she returned the more you get involved with him. If you're rational enough to evaluate a relationship and get out if you see it has no chance of going anywhere then get to know what the deal was this week when you hang out with him. You know he was hanging with the ex, no doubt about it. Is she even the ex or they have a strange "while I'm away, agreement?" If he was with the ex, I'd move on - he's obviously not over his feelings for her and what about when she comes home?

How recently exed are they? If this is an old, old relationship that may change things. You know, you're in town to visit, neither of you has a significant other, looking to make the most out of your time home. I have had liasons like that that mean nothing and I return to life as usual when the time passes, and if I'm involved with someone the next time the situation presents itself than I have to take a pass.

Again, he didn't call because he wasn't going to make time to see you and didn't want to let you know what he was up to those days. That's not a big deal if you guys just met. He could genuinely be interested in you but he was taking advantage of his familiarity with the ex or is still involved with her.