Cliche but i really want to ask

[Millie24]

I post in another thread, but this is difference matter. I am married but recontact with my old crush (22 years ago, and he was only an acquaintance) these last two months. He knows i am married, he is still single. We live in different country, so our conversation held by online only. I know that i am possibly emotional cheating with him, but i am not sure yet. I should know that he is really into me, because if not, it will useless i consider that what we do is cheating kind.

All conversation always nice and long, at least 1 hour. I always start the texting first, but he always fast reply in longer text than mine. Even when he was busy, he spare his time to chat with me. When i have nothing to say, he always initiate so our chat always long and live. He addressed me several sweet names, praise, said that he likes me, he comfortable chatting with me, dont want if i stop chat for days (i said i am afraid bothering him, so i asked him twice if i should pause the chat for some days) But, he talked about his last girl friend or sexual experiences or fantasies with young girls. Not much, but he mentioned it three or for times. And we talked about general topics, politics, culture, art, tv shows, unimportant things.

Those make me doubt, is he like me romantically or just friend or even only acquaintance?

[basilandthyme]

Millie, you are married. If you are at all in doubt about the integrity of this old crush, simply stop contacting him.

[Millie24]

Thank you for your reply, if i am sure he like me romantically, i will stop contact him. But if he just like me as a friend, why should I?

[dontaskme]

You may think that what you're doing is pretty benign but this will create a wedge between you and your husband. You may not realize this yet but as you spend more time chatting and emotionally cheating with this guy, you are also emotionally distancing yourself from your spouse.

[basilandthyme]

Thank you for your reply, if i am sure he like me romantically, i will stop contact him. But if he just like me as a friend, why should I?

You're already questioning whether or not he has romantic feelings. If it was just a regular friendship, you wouldn't have to ask this question.

[Jffs24]

If you find you would rather talk to him over the internet over spending time with your husband, or also you cancel real life events to sit online and talk that hour with him -- then you have a problem, maybe you are bored or lonely in your marriage and that's why you need to talk with this guy. If it doesn't feel right, stop it.

[Millie24]

I still have time to chat with husband or doing another thing, it just one hour, in my spare time. But i think i need to stop this, wether he like me romantically or just friend. Thank you everyone.

[Ntsikzo]

Millie I think it is obvious that there is a problem in your marriage, hence you feel the need to communicate with this guy from the past. Whatever the problem might be, this is the perfect time to fix it. I think you need to make some time just you and your husband to discuss your marriage. Maybe the marriage just needs some spicing up. In any case once you find out what's lacking in your marriage, you might find that you no longer need to chat with your anymore.

[Millie24]

Ntsikzo, thank you. Honestly, i dont find any problem with our marriage. We still chat and very very rarely fight, our last small fight was last year. So it will be weird if i discuss it with my husband, out of the blue. But yes, i m trying so hard to stop communicate with the guy